Moving

I am discontinuing this blog for the time being and moving to another space. My new address is jenjepsen.blogspot.com It's time to move beyond Ironman (I may return, just not sure when) to issues of faith.

Thank you all for reading about my IM journey!

Jen

Post 100

I cannot believe that I have had enough to say for a year to warrant 100 posts. Yikes. When I began the blog I was terrified of my writing ability, expressing myself, and potentially failing. Well, I suppose if one is honest and speaks his/her mind, there really isn't the opportunity to fail. I may lose readership, but whatever.

So, this weekend, yesterday and today, for 16 total hours, Eric and I attended training through Boulder County to serve in the area of foster parenting, respite care or fost-adopt. We have one more day of training next weekend, but it is nice to have 2/3 behind us. We are not 100% certain, in what capacity we will serve, but we are going down the path to be better informed, fully understanding what we are getting ourselves and our family into.

I can definitely say, at this point, that my heart has been opened. I have moments of fear and concern, but these are countered by equal parts desire to provide a difference in the life of a child who has done nothing to deserve their situation but be born. I look at my own three peeps and think about how truly "easy" their little lives are. They don't live in a state of survival or fear (for the most part, except for the two days/month I should be certified clinically insane). They have cozy beds, painted rooms, great clothes, ample food, safe community and schools, advocates, teachers of faith, love, and grace, etc. They are supervised, questioned, disciplined, accounted for and rewarded. Many of these children who need homes just need to know they are safe. All children (and adults for that matter) are entitled to food, shelter, safety, and love. Do we all receive this? If we did...what would the world look like? Boulder County? Longmont?

My heart is certifiably broken. I am humbled beyond measure. I am floored by the hearts of people in our community. I am blessed to see the need and know that I can play a part, no matter how small, in making a difference. Am I scared? Yes. Do I know what I'm doing? No. Am I trusting? Yes. Is God faithful? Absolutely. Who knows where all this will lead, but I am excited and incredibly grateful, once again.

I have not fallen off the face of the planet!

Here are a few things I've been up to:

1. Ran the Denver Marathon October 17. Managed a 3:52, which was a tad too slow for Boston Qualification. Stressed a bit the next day about trying to qualify and the decision was made for me by 5:00 that night when Boston filled up in an unprecedented 8 hours. Oh well...can't say I didn't give it a fair shake. I was happy with my performance and let go of the BQ goal at about mile 16 when the pace began slowing. Sometimes it's important to be flexible. The marathon was a wonderful bridge for me after the Ironman...to come off the incredible accomplishment, but still have a goal.

2. Kids are all in school full time. I am happy with the schedule, but can feel a bit "unproductive". The feeling eventually passes and I get busy with kids at 3:30 for the next 5 hours every day.

3. I've been questioning a lot about my faith. I am 100% certain now that I am on the right path of grace and love. I am tired of Christians, frankly. I want to make a difference for Jesus in the world through love.

4. We are moving forward in becoming Foster Parents through Boulder County. Our first day of "training" is next week. I am very interested to see where we wind up with all of this. As in Ironman, I am getting more excited than scared. I cannot wait to meet our new "peeps" soon.

5. Hopped in the pool for the first time in two months. I swam 2400 yards and it was awesome...looking forward to getting rolling again.

6. Starting Pilates this week with an instructor friend. I'll let you know what I think.

7. Considering my goals for next season. I'm thinking about shooting for sprint and olympic distance triathlons, one half ironman and running races, namely the half marathon distance.

8. Enjoying an easy week and contemplating painting.

I am feeling great after the marathon. My body healed and recovered quickly. It's so nice to have the fitness base that I do now. I am wondering what next season will look like. I would like to see some faster times with the shorter distances, since I've been focusing on such long distances. It is really neat to know that I can do a lot more than I give myself credit for!

Twenty Miler

Yesterday I had the wonderful privilege of doing my 20 mile run. Thankfully a dear friend joined me for the middle third, which made the whole thing much more palatable. Actually, I had a good time. I averaged a 9:20 pace, which I think is adequate to attempt a Boston Qualifier...we'll see. I am at least hopeful for October 17.

Running has been great, kids are great, everything is just clicking away at a nice little clip. Not much to report, just hanging on and doing my best to be a decent individual.

A New Leaf

So...hello....it's been awhile. Sorry about that. I just haven't felt very compelled to write, not much to say...at least not from the Triathlon end of things. I am still training for the Denver Marathon. Managed 16 miles yesterday early. It was a great run and I feel pretty good today. I did manage to eat my weight in food afterwards, but oh well.

The summer has ended well. The kids all went seamlessly to school. They are very happy, including my new full day Kindergartner. He is in Heaven...as am I. The days to myself are something I've not had for about a decade. Fortunately, I was warned by many a mother to relax into the new schedule because it is super easy to fill the time. My desire has been to get things done during the day (including a nap) and relish the kids being home at the end of the day. Some days are better than others, but I do see myself now as a mom that does best when I'm not always ON! I need my time to myself and with other grownups. I am so grateful that I don't have to work and that I'm not currently training for an Ironman. Been there, done that. Not forever, but for now it's perfect.

The puppy, Theo, is working out great. We have all adopted him and he us. He is fantastic and offers us much consternation and joy each day. We are very grateful he came into our lives when he did and has given us the grace and time to grieve our Maddy.

Running is such a wonderful thing right now. I was riding my bike...I stopped. I have re-entered the world of swimming also, just once a week. I need the simplicity. I need to just have shoes, my heart rate monitor, ipod and dirt roads. I needed about 5 weeks post Ironman to get back into it. Now it's just part of me! I am doing more running in the later morning, after the kids go to school, which is different. It's hot! That will all change soon, though. I'm curious what weather the marathon will bring...maybe the 80 degree temp training will pay off. I still want to qualify for Boston, but not holding my breath. If I get there...great. If not...no biggie. I will have made a solid effort.

We are on the cusp of some new things in our life as a family. I can't really talk about it here, but would appreciate prayers if you think of us. I am so grateful for the work God is doing in me and have seen new perspectives in my life since the Ironman. What an amazing way to learn His amazing faithfulness. He is so good to me.

Not feeling it...

So, in my return to "training" since Cd'A, I just assumed that three weeks off would be sufficient. NOT! My goodness. This is my second week of running, some cycling and one swim. I feel like I'm moving through cement, my heart rate is either super low or high....you name it. I don't want to be ungrateful or minimize my IM experience...but I feel like crap. Anyways, I'm not sure what to do about it and I'm not sure if I should even maintain the goals I've set. It just seems like maybe I need a break of more than 3 weeks.

It's weird how you can be completely on top of your game...feeling strong and fast and then just... blah. I don't get it, but I suspect my body is trying to tell me something. I will do my best to listen...or not. Maybe I'll just push through. I'll let you know.

Life is going well. Summer is moving along...some days it seems at molasses pace. Many days, we hunker down during the heat of the day and come out at night. Even the puppy sleeps all day and resumes his silly antics in the evening when the edge is off. Kids return to school in three weeks. I am REALLY trying not to fantasize too much...but the thought of having the time to myself gets me all giddy inside. I don't want to wish the days away, but I do.

Bitter and Sweet

Today is a day I have been dreading, but knowing it would come sooner than later. Our wonderful dog, Maddy, needs to be put to sleep. Her decline has been steady up until now, it is clear. She has been a steadfast, patient presence in our lives since before having children, 11 years ago. She is a blessing, a running partner, a supporter, a tolerator, for all of these years. I am so grateful to have had her in my life and will miss her large body and spirit as she heads to Doggy Heaven. I pray for the ability for my kids to grieve and for Eric and I to be an example in this. Remember that movie from awhile ago? The one with Sally Field and Michael J. Fox who are the voices to the two dogs and cat traversing the countryside looking for their owners? Well, the Golden Retriever voice is the voice I've given to Maddy in female form. I imagine she talks to me in her head in the voice of Maya Angelou...a calm, authoritative tone that offers insight and protection. We have been through pregnancies, births, sleepless nights, babies, toddlers, sassy tweens, snowstorms, thunderstorms, heat waves, new businesses, graduations, new homes, new and old neighbors, 5 marathons, many triathlons, and Ironman. There is nothing like a beloved pet to mark the passing of time and major life events. I know she has loved unconditionally. She has been my partner in life and I haven't always been the nicest of housemates. There is nothing like a beloved pet to mark the passing of time and major life events. I know she has loved unconditionally. I will miss you Maddy-girl.



On the sweet side, we acquired a new puppy just Tuesday. He is a love and a bundle of sweet, exuberant energy. I know this will make the transition easier for all of us. His name is Theo, he's a Portuguese Water Dog and 4 months old. I am so grateful for him and believe he will bring us to the next stages of life: all kids in school full-time, middle school and high school years, graduations, drivers' licenses, and a whole host of other things I cannot imagine. We are blessed and grateful for this little guy.

A heavy week, for sure. It will be a day of sadness, remembrance, gratitude and laughter...the whole gamut.