Uncertainty

The one huge thing about IM training that I didn't really think about was the uncertainty. I had to take yesterday off because of the uncertain schedule...one thing after another, plus a sick kid. Today, do I bag the brick because I need to get the swim in? Do I move everything back a day and do the brick tomorrow? Do the swim today? Do the brick tomorrow after church or skip church? Save the swim for the afternoon or do it first thing in the morning? But if I swim in the morning and the weather looks good in the afternoon, should I still do my brick?

This crap is running through my head and has been for the last 3 days. I check the weather report over and over again, seeing if in the last 3 minutes it has changed in my favor. What if I have to ride indoors again? Will I be preparing myself well enough for Ironman? Am I copping out by not embracing the elements? Am I being stupid, thinking I'm a good enough rider to sustain weather and wind? AHHHHHHHHHHH....ENOUGH ALREADY! Sheesh.

Well, now that I've spewed my internal brain dialogue all over you...I apologize. My mind and I seem to be at odds most of the time.

I love spring weather...I usually can't get enough of it. Colorado weather is one of the things that drew me here. But, the uncertainty of it now feels like a curse. And now I'm being one of those super annoying people that whines about it...too hot, too cold, too windy, too sunny, too rainy. I don't want to be that person. This is what I get for signing up for an early summer race. It's OK. I want to get it over with so I can enjoy the fun summer with my family...that was the point.

Anyways, at this point my hope is to swim later and brick tomorrow after church. I have a stabilizer week coming up, so it won't throw much of a wrench into the next week of training, thankfully.